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Author’s Note: This is a fetish story involving gross bodily functions.
My name is Emily, and I’m a gross person.
There’s something bizarre about my digestive system: I produce a pheromone that makes people horny, and whenever I poop or fart I release it into the air. I’m not immune to my own scent, either.
I don’t release my pheromones carelessly. I’d never want to see my little sisters getting horny, for example. So when we’re on a long car ride together, I have to clench my sphincter shut, watch what I eat, and even force myself to stay awake, since I know I sometimes fart in my sleep.
Vacations are especially hard. With small hotel rooms and no privacy, I don’t get many chances to poop. I’m sometimes forced to hold it in for three or four days at a time, just to avoid any weird sexual moments.
The incident I’m about to relate happened on a vacation, actually. It was a few weeks after my last story, and I was visiting my friend Kat at her college out of state.
At this point, Kat was living off-campus in a small apartment. It was fall break, and all her roommates were gone, so we had the place to ourselves.
I came to visit on a Thursday afternoon, and we spent the first two days catching up. I showed her my new tattoo – I was filling out my left shoulder at the time – and Kat talked endlessly about the new guy she liked.
Derek was the guy’s name. She’d been trying to seduce him for weeks, she said, but hadn’t gotten anywhere yet. She begged me to play Cupid for them. Nobody knew about my weird sex-farts, of course, but I had a reputation for helping people hook up.
So we took Derek out to a crowded bar on Friday night. Kat worked her seduction skills pretty hard, while I released a couple of silent farts. I didn’t feel any effects, though; I couldn’t even smell it. I think the bar was too crowded for the gas to reach us properly.
“I really wanted to wear something strapless tonight,” Kat cooed to Derek at one point, “but I’m not sure my boobs are big enough. I dunno, what do you think?” She squeezed her tits practically in Derek’s face, showing off the deep cleavage in her half-unbuttoned shirt.
Derek just made a face, and I nudged Kat in the ribs: go easy, hotshot.
He bailed on us shortly afterwards, and Kat groaned as we walked home alone. “Is it me?” she asked. “I haven’t had sex in like a year… am I just ugly?”
“Don’t be silly,” I said. Kat was perhaps the best-looking person I knew, and I told her so. She was in great shape, she could pull off any outfit she wanted, and she had a body that would drive any straight guy crazy. During the last year, she’d developed a cool alternative vibe that made her even sexier: lots of button-down shirts, old jeans, and deep red lipstick. Even though I’m straight, I know a gorgeous woman when I see one.
“…And not only are you super-hot,” I went on, “but you’re also smart and tough and hilarious and a great friend. You’re totally awesome.”
“I knew I kept you around for something,” Kat laughed.
The next day was Saturday, and I was approaching three days without pooping. I felt stuffed and bloated, and my insides were cramping. So when Kat checked her email and realized she had a meeting that day, I was secretly overjoyed.
“I’m really sorry,” she said, as she pulled her shoes on. “I’m starting this group project. I promised I’d meet my partner at the library.”
“It’s totally fine,” I said.
“I feel bad leaving you, though.”
“I was planning to take a nap anyway,” I lied. “I won’t even know you’re gone.”
Finally, I got Kat out the door. I waited five minutes, just in case she forgot something, and then I settled onto the toilet.
Some people are easy poopers. Kat, for example, had no problem taking a dump whenever she felt like it. She’d gone a few times already during my visit. She even announced it sometimes: “Hold on, Emily – I have to poo.” But she only took a couple of minutes, and the smell didn’t linger long.
I’m not like that. For me, a normal poop takes all five hearts in Candy Crush – a good fifteen minutes. I also prefer that the entire area be evacuated first. Not only is the smell pretty strong, but it lasts a long time. And just a couple of whiffs makes people crave sex.
Like I said, I’m not immune to my own pheromones. I get super-horny whenever I’m on the toilet. If I have extra time and privacy, I’ll usually masturbate afterwards.
Today, after holding it in for so long, it felt great to just relax my bowels for a while. I pulled out my phone and started matching candies, letting out those deep, pre-pooping farts. I can be noisy on the toilet, so I was glad to have the apartment to myself.
As the smell filled my lungs, my body began to respond: my skin grew warm, tingling pleasantly, and I started getting that familiar yearning to be filled up. I stuck a hand under my shirt as I continued playing on my phone, absently touching my nipples over my bra.
After a minute, my bowels began to move. Taking bahis firmaları a three-day shit is like having a baby: first I felt myself stretching wide, then I felt the slow emergence of that heavy weight. My face scrunched up involuntarily.
I resisted the urge to push. Just let it slide out, I thought.
I pulled my hand out of my shirt and stuck it between my legs. Gross as it sounds, I sometimes put a couple of fingers in my vagina while I’m pooping. It’s supposed to help you go. I never actually noticed a difference, but it’s a good enough excuse to play around down there.
My vaginal discharge was heavy today, I noticed. My underwear and labia – and now my fingers, too – were slick with the thin, whitish cream that I sometimes produce in the middle of my cycle. I think it means I’m ovulating. Obviously I wasn’t ready for kids yet, but it was cool to think about my body as ripe and fertile… hungry for a man’s sperm.
I felt myself getting warmer and wetter, and I began to move my fingers slowly in and out. Meanwhile, in the back, a thick turd was sliding out of me, and the heavy smell was making my head swim.
Suddenly, I heard the apartment door open. Oh shit, I thought.
“Emily?” Kat called. “You here?”
“I’m in the bathroom!” I called back.
“Nice place,” I heard a guy’s voice say.
Great, I thought with irritation. Kat brought a guy over?
“I thought you were going to the library?” I asked the door loudly. My fingers were still frozen inside myself.
“We bumped into Derek on the way. I figured maybe he could sit with us while we worked, and then we could hang out afterwards.”
So she’d brought Derek, too. This might work to Kat’s advantage, I thought.
“Hi, Derek,” I called.
“Hey, Emily,” I heard his muffled voice say.
Kat knocked on the door. “Are you going to be in there much longer?” she asked.
I heard Kat explain to the others, “Emily’s dropping a deuce.”
“I can hear you!” I cried.
“I thought girls don’t poop,” the unfamiliar guy chuckled. I heard them settling onto the living room couches, just outside the bathroom door.
“I guess you never lived with a girl,” Kat laughed. “Now that I’m vegan, I poo about twice a day.”
Their conversation turned to classwork. I heard Kat and the new guy discussing their class project, while Derek remained silent.
Sitting on the toilet, I was still pretty horny, so I kept my fingers inside myself… but I felt too awkward to masturbate seriously. I distracted myself by playing on my phone with my other hand, just waiting for my bowels to empty themselves.
Maybe five minutes later, the last turd slipped out of me. It hit the water with a loud plop – I’m sure the others could hear it – but I felt much better afterwards.
“You almost done in there?” Kat asked.
“Almost.” As I began wiping, I asked, “You sure you guys don’t want to… relocate for a while?”
“Geez, Emily.” I could almost hear Kat’s eyes rolling. “We’re all human beings. We know what poo smells like.”
“If you say so,” I said. Kat’s bathroom was bare-bones, with no candles or air fresheners. I wiped until I felt clean, then flushed and exited the bathroom.
I took a deep breath: the fresh air felt nice in my lungs. Derek, Kat, and the new guy waved at me.
“Nice to meet you, Emily!” said the new guy.
Maybe it was the pheromones I’d been breathing, but the new guy looked smoking hot to me. He was tall and slightly dark – maybe part Asian – with messy black hair and nicely-fitting clothes. He had a slim build with broad shoulders; a classic swimmer’s body.
“Hell-oo,” I said, leaning across the table for a handshake. “What’s your name?”
Kat gave me a look. “Emily, this is Will. We’re working on a project together. For class.”
Will smiled. “Nice to put a face to the voice.”
I smiled back, melting a little inside. Even now, I was thinking about kissing him.
Kat was still glaring at me as I sat on an armchair nearby. Trying not to stare at Will, I looked at Derek instead. He glanced at me uncomfortably, and I waved to him. “Hi, Derek.”
“Hi, Emily.” He gave a nervous wave, as if hiding armpit sweat. Derek was cute, in a buttoned-up way, but he was perpetually awkward: the kind of guy who seemed weird around women. Frankly, I had no idea what Kat saw in him.
“We’ll probably work for an hour,” Kat said. She and Will sat on the couch together, with papers spread out on the coffee table. “Maybe you and Derek can watch TV till we’re done? We won’t mind.”
I put the TV on, mostly for Derek, and leaned back in the armchair with my eyes half-closed. “Actually,” I said, “I might just conk out till you’re done, if that’s okay.”
“Sure,” Kat said. “We’ll wake you up later.”
But I didn’t really plan on sleeping. I felt horny and mischievous, and I wanted to see what happened when the pheromones hit everyone.
It wasn’t long before my poop smell from the bathroom wafted into the kaçak iddaa room. Despite her usual body-positivity, it was Kat who wrinkled her nose. “God, Emily – that smells terrible!”
I shrugged. “I warned you, didn’t I?”
Within a few minutes, however, the disgust on her face melted away. I began to see the tell-tale signs of Kat’s arousal. We had never mentioned the incident a few weeks ago – the time we were both overcome by horniness and masturbated together – but I remembered every moment. I remembered the dreamy expression on her face, with her lips parted, and the way she squirmed uncomfortably in her seat. I remembered the way her voice shifted, too, getting softer and higher-pitched.
“Mm, I kinda feel like taking a break,” she breathed. “Derek, you can sit next to me if you want…”
She shifted over, patting an empty spot on the couch. Derek just shook his head stiffly. The pheromone was affecting him, too: his face had gone bright red, and he breathed so hard he was practically panting. The bulge in his pants was fairly obvious. Yet he didn’t seem to enjoy the sensation. His expression was terrified, like somebody who’d smoked too much weed.
“Actually, I think… I’d better leave,” he said. Derek lurched out of his chair, hunching over to hide his erection, and turned to the door.
“No, wait!” Kat held her hand out. “Just stay a little longer?”
He shook his head again, closing his eyes. “I’m feeling kinda funny. I think I need to go home.”
“Oh,” Kat pouted. “Well… See you later?”
As he slammed the door behind him, we sat in silence for a moment. Then Will started chuckling. “For the record,” he said, teasing me, “I don’t think the smell is THAT bad.”
I laughed and smiled at Will again, checking out his reaction to the pheromone. He definitely looked flushed, and something appeared stiff beneath his dark slacks, but there was also an eager twinkle in his eye.
“Guys, it’s not funny,” Kat said. “Maybe I scared him off.”
“I’m sure it wasn’t you,” I said.
“I hope not.” She sighed. “Anyway, we should get back to work.”
Will nodded, and the two of them began to talk classwork again. We continued to marinate in my poop stink, swimming in sex pheromones, but they were both determined to remain professional.
I frowned to myself. This was the sort of situation I tried to avoid, where nobody could act on their feelings and things simply became awkward. Kat was still visibly aroused, but she would blink hard whenever she lost focus, dismissing any sexual thoughts. Meanwhile, Will gripped his seat cushions with white knuckles, as if clinging to rationality. Together, they made slow but visible progress on their work.
I passed the long minutes looking at the television, but not really watching it. Soon, mostly out of boredom, I began to doze off. I would blink, with increasingly heavy eyes, and forget to open them for a while. I caught my head drooping against my chest, or against the side of the armchair. I felt a bit of drool at the edge of my mouth and wiped it off without the others noticing.
I thought maybe I’d pass the whole hour like this – just dozing intermittently – but eventually I fell into a much deeper sleep, and my mind became engrossed in dreams. I dreamed that I was the President of the United States, and I was trying to have sex and get pregnant as often as possible. You see, when a sitting President had a baby, that baby would become the next President automatically…
* * *
Twenty minutes after Derek left, Emily began to snore.
Splayed out in my armchair, her head rested awkwardly on her shoulder, and her mouth hung loose and open. Her eyes were squeezed tightly shut, eyeballs drifting slowly beneath her heavy lids.
Will nudged me. “Kat, I think your friend is out cold.”
“She’s a really good sleeper,” I replied. Emily had been visiting for a few days now, sharing my queen-sized bed like when we were teenagers. Each night, she barely closed her eyes before falling fast asleep. “I’m a little jealous. I wake up for everything.”
Will watched her closely. “She’s drooling,” he observed.
“Don’t make fun of her. She’s my best friend.”
“Don’t get me wrong,” he said quickly. “I think she’s very pretty. Just… slightly prettier when she’s awake.”
“She is pretty, isn’t she,” I said, a little distracted.
I didn’t know what was wrong with me lately, but I seemed to get horny constantly whenever Emily was around. Every night after she fell asleep, I would lay awake and watch her sleep for a while. She was cute. Normally she was reserved – the sort of girl who rarely burped or farted – but in sleep she became soft and vulnerable, releasing her little toots under the blanket. Gradually, my eyes would drift to the other parts of her body: the curve of her neck, the colorful tattoos on her shoulder, and even (if I moved the blanket slightly) the slight curve of her breasts beneath her shirt. Laying beside her, I’d quietly touch myself.
A few kaçak bahis weeks ago, while we were hanging out at her parent’s house one night, I’d lost control of myself and masturbated in front of her. She didn’t shame me; in fact, she’d actually joined in herself. We never spoke about the incident again, but I think it brought us closer.
Even just now, while trying to work, I’d suddenly become so horny I could barely concentrate. I blamed it on Derek, but I now wasn’t so sure.
I’ll simply say it: I’m not completely straight, and I think Emily is hot. Of course, she doesn’t see herself that way. She thinks she’s too heavy, which is crazy, and she hates her small boobs. She doesn’t notice that she’s got the most rocking ass and hips I’ve ever seen in my life. She makes me wish I were a dude, with a proper dick, so I could bend her over a table and fuck her.
I hadn’t always felt this way. A few years ago, during Emily’s health crisis, I’d felt more like a mother to her. But recently, my sexual attraction seemed stronger each time I saw her.
I licked my lips… but then I realized Will was talking to me.
“Sorry?” I asked.
“I’m just saying we should get back to work. I don’t think we’ve been making very good time…”
“I know.” I rubbed the back of my neck, embarrassed. “I’ve been getting really distracted.”
“Yeah.” Will looked into my eyes and smiled. “I’ve been getting distracted, too.”
I felt another lurch of sexual desire, this time for Will. God, what was wrong with me? I glanced at his lips, wondering what would happen if I kissed him right now… but then I pushed those thoughts away.
I cleared my throat. “Let’s get back to work.”
We labored through another couple of bullet points, but we soon got sidetracked again: Emily had begun farting in her sleep, a series of short emissions like gas bubbles.
We both giggled. “Cute little toots,” I said.
Will looked mock-philosophical. “Today, I learned that girls poop,” he said, “and now I’ve learned that they fart, too.”
“It’s almost like we’re human beings or something.” I rolled my eyes. “Anyway, should we get back to work?”
I looked at Will and found him staring at me, a quiet desire in his eye. And suddenly I was feeling it, too. My whole body burned for him.
“Kat,” he said, “I know this is really forward, but I kinda want to…” He bit his lip, unable to articulate his desires.
“Me too,” I said.
Before he could speak further, I practically jumped on him, throwing my arms around his shoulders. My lips found his, and I closed my eyes and kissed him hungrily.
He tried to mumble something, but then he began kissing me back. Our tongues touched, and then our teeth clicked together as I let myself melt into him.
He fell onto his back, and I rested my body on top of him. As we kissed, he cautiously touched my body: my hips, my sides.
Finally, I grabbed his hand and picked it up. “You can touch my boobs if you want,” I said.
He nodded, licking his lips.
Deftly, I undid the top button on my shirt. Then I took his hand and guided him inside, pressing his palm against my bra. He squeezed me slightly, cupping my breast with his fingers.
I leaned down and kissed him again, leaving enough space for his hands. The way I was laying on him, I could feel his stiff cock against the inside of my thigh.
I wanted him inside me, I realized. Probably not a great idea at this time of the month, I thought, but I hadn’t had sex in a whole year.
Then, from the armchair, I began to hear somebody moving…
* * *
“Mmmm…” I stretched out, rubbing my eyes. It was hard waking up – I’d slept much more deeply than I’d meant to.
I felt good, though. I felt… horny. I’d been having sex in my dream, but something told me it was more than that.
When I opened my eyes, I saw Kat and Will looking flushed and ruffled on the couch. Kat had even undone a button on her shirt.
“I’m sorry,” I said, scratching the back of my neck. “I have a feeling I farted in my sleep.”
Kat smiled. “It was cute, Emily.”
She stood up, straightening her clothes, and walked to the bathroom. “I think we’re done working – I just need to clean up a little.”
She shut the door behind her. I stood and stretched my legs.
“Hey, Will,” I said, smiling sleepily at him.
“Hey yourself, Emily.”
I made sure to spread my legs as I stretched, showing off my hips. I’m far less attractive than Kat, but I know some guys are into women with my shape.
For his part, Will definitely looked hot and bothered – I guess my pheromones had been affecting him for a while. I could see flushed skin all the way down his neck. He made no effort to hide the tent in his pants, either.
I was deeply aroused as well. My body buzzed with sex pheromones, and I felt desperate to be touched.
I sat next to Will on the couch. “Sorry I slept through most of our first meeting,” I said. “I was hoping to make a good impression on you.”
Will smirked. “You made an impression so far.”
I listened to any sounds from the bathroom. I didn’t hear Kat peeing, so I guessed she was going number two. That gave us a few minutes.
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